I finally had worn out an old kettle burner - the type one uses to prepare a "boil" like crawfish or lobster or crab. These are the outdoor propane burners that sits under a large kettle and heats whatever is in the 6 gallon kettle above it. Others use these to boil water and components for beer, as do I, but many others use these to fry whole turkeys in oil. Whole turkey frying became much more popular in the mid-2000's, and with that, the masses tried their hand at it. Of course, instructions were ignored, in the name of manliness, wisdom, or hubris, and as a result US fire departments were called to 156,000 home fires in 2011, with many accidents likely self-extinguished. Therefore, these types of burners were made subject to additional government agency requirements in design to help insure the less intelligent consumers from their own lack of fire safety. Unfortunately, the changes required to outdoor cooking products like these clashed with the drive to lower the cost of these units due to competition. Most sell for less than $100 USD, and therefore the safety enhancements needed to be added at a minimal cost. However, these changes such as temperature monitoring and cooking vessel sensors aren't inexpensive, simple improvements. So, they were done as inexpensively as possible, and in doing so, design and components suffered, thereby making them nearly impossible to make effective. My experience has been one of safety sarcasm...I spend more time messing around with the product close to flowing gas, ignition sources or flames than I do warming the kettle. So, in the end, the safety devices mandated for the idiots actually makes the product more dangerous to use. Hopefully the accident statistics wake up the governmental agencies soon to allow for alterations to the specifications to truly make these things safer. Until then, the old style, pre-mandate burners will continue to sell for a premium on ebay, and consumers will ignite home fires for entirely new reasons other than dunking a frozen turkey into 200+ degree oil.
Another example of safety sarcasm comes in the form of a gasoline container. Recently, a product failure in a vehicle I was driving led to my running out of fuel. As the vehicle's gauge didn't accurately read the fuel level, the engine stopped on a major freeway, at night in a snow/sleet storm. I didn't have any advance warning, so the best I could do was to pull over as far as possible and set the hazard flashers. After a long brisk, wet walk to purchase a fuel container, I finally found a large home improvement warehouse with 6 different fuel containers. Each had a new device on the nozzle which wouldn't allow dispensing of fuel without turning a safety lock and then compressing the nozzle. Having no other choice, I bought this container, and proceeded to find fuel and return to the stranded vehicle. In the dark and snow, I located a flashlight to figure out exactly what this new design required to pour fuel. Unfortunately, the government agency seemingly thought of exactly one requirement when mandating this design on all manufacturers - dispensing fuel into a small machine's tank. The nozzle required one hand to hold the container (upwards of 40 pounds, full with 5 gallons) and another to hold a safety slide to one side. It also required that the nozzle be compressed in order to dispense fuel. I learned all this as I stood within 6 feet of semi trucks doing 75 miles per hour.
Recall it's 25 degrees F and snowing, and add deafening sounds, blinding headlights, and gusts of passing blowback.In the middle of this extremely dangerous situation, I'm trying to use a flashlight to ensure I've got the safety slide right, and trying to find something on the vehicle's fuel intake to "catch" the nozzle on so as to allow fuel to dispense. The problem is...vehicles don't have a catch like this. So, while my life is in more danger than I've ever been while filling a lawnmower, I'm being "protected" by the safety "improvements" made to the modern fuel container. I had to stand in that extremely dangerous position for 15 minutes rather than 3 due to this improvement. Luckily I finally figured out a way to get the fuel from the container into the vehicle's tank without being killed. Again, ebay holds all manner of older options for those that wish to more safely dispense fuel to a standed vehicle.
I hope more consumers raise concerns about these isolated design "improvements", so we can reduce this safety sarcasm, and hopefully prevent injuries.
